Welcome Baby M!

Luis, Emilio and I are super pleased to announce the arrival of baby M, born Sunday 25th September 2016 in Talagante, Chile.

An intense natural birth with the world-famous in Chile Talagante midwives. I can’t recommend Rosa and Eliana enough. For a holistic approach to birth, please send them a Whatsapp message:

Secretary (for appointments): 56 9 9796 4143

Rosa Maria (lead midwife): 56 9 8428 4658

Eliana (midwife): 56 9 4277 8258

*detailed post coming soon*

Open Letter to Hospital Roberto del Rio

(I wrote this at Emilio’s bedside in hospital last year, and misplaced it until recently)

Dear Hospital Roberto del Rio,

When my 19month old Chilean son stopped breathing on Tuesday I did not think about the distinctions between public/private, Chilean/extranjero – I did not even think forward enough to put my shoes on. To see my son’s lips turn blue, eyes rolled back in his head and his small body convulse with seizures drove all thoughts from my mind except “save my baby.” Roberto del Rio is the closest hospital to my house and considered one of the best for pediatric care, and as we rode there in a stranger’s car I had no idea of the trial that was just beginning.

I have no real qualms about the care we received in Urgencia  – my son was saved not once but twice and all manner of exams were organized quickly. However when he was transferred to the children’s ward two things happened that was troubling, upsetting and concerning.  The first is that my position as a New Zealander with limited Spanish resulted in a condescending attitude being shown towards me by staff with a complete lack of communication on their part.  I was told that I should not be there if I couldn’t speak fluent Spanish, medicines were adminstered without my knowledge or consent, exam results were never explained and intimate details about my son’s case and our family were relayed to the other patients in the ward. Important questions were even directed to them. I was laughed at during my attempts to communicate (by the doctor no less) and those who did speak fluent English did not disclose this information. I felt abandoned, stressed and worried because I felt my son was not being laughed and instead of feeling support around me, all I felt was attack.  From a medical standpoint, the lack of interaction and interest shown is particularly concerning as vital information about my son’s symptoms were ignored or unheard by medical staff, meaning that they did not have a clear picture of my son’s condition.

The second concern is how my son was treated. He was confined to the cot – his place of rest – during his stay, and received all medical treatments and examinations in it. Twice a day he was left alone for testing for up to an hour and a half. He was not permitted to see his parents at the same time, which in our case is particularly troubling given then the father speaks English and could act as a translator.  My son very quickly began to exhibit signs of severe psychological stress and trauma: screaming, violent behahavior to himself, difficulty sleeping, self harm whenever he was left alone or saw a staff member coming. Staff members made derogatory remarks about him to co-workers and other patients in the ward, spoke harshly to him during testing and monitoring, and at times handled him very roughly (including forcefully administering a blood test that caused him great pain). Each time he was forced to be without me contributed greatly to his mounting terror.

I am disgusted that we should suffer such care and psychological harm in a place of care by the very people who take oaths to protect us. That my personal status as a non-chilean should have any bearing upon the care given to a baby is deplorable. To hear Chileans around me say that I must “suck it up or my son will be punished” goes against the core of biomedicine and of human rights in general. We are just two of many who have suffered at the hands of the system and will continue to suffer unless urgent attention is given to rectifying what I believe to be despicable breaches of ethical conduct.

Yours Sincerely,

Helen Cordery

UPDATE: After concluding our week-long stay at Roberto del Rio, and after having unnescessary tests performed, wrong medicines administered and various conflicting information and advice handed out, we returned home. Over the next few months we lived with a severely traumatised child. He could not sleep alone or eat properly,  developed a morbid fear of strange people and things and lost weight.  It took a very long time for our family to settle back into a normal routine and now, a year on, our son is still terrified of any medical situation.

Roberto del Rio Acceptable Practice Examples:

1. Urgencia doctors exhibited professionalism
2. One excellent female doctor in the ward that we saw on the Thursday morning
3. Quick exams performed in Urgencia
4. One friendly tecnical assistant during our ward stay.

 

List of Grievances:

1. Lack of translation, interest in translation or attempts at communicating with me, despite being our son’s carer
2. One nurse hurt Emilio while administering a blood test and made no apology
3. One nurse reprimanded us for not getting appropriately attired before bringing our technically-dead son to the hospital
4. Spinal exam performed without anaesthetic
5. Three doctors did not disclose to me that they could speak fluent English in the ward, even when I was visually struggling to communicate vital information
6. The Declaration of our rights was partially translated into English but most of it was not
7. All exams were administered when Emilio was in his cot
8. Despite being told our twice-daily seperaion would last 10-20 minutes, one time it lasted 1.5 hours.
9. Conflicting information from nurses
10. Nurses talked about our case to other patients in the room, sometimes negatively
11. Staff directed all questions to other patients in the room instead of to me
12. At no time was information given to us about our son’s condition, his test results or his medicines
13. One doctor laughed at me while attempting to speak
14. Repeated remarks made about my son being “too scared” and that it was “the mother’s fault.”
15. No attempt to ease his pain
16. No nappy cream administered or offered despite having diarrhoea that was acidic. His entire bottom was bleeding and leaking green pus.
17. No help when Emilio vomited and could not breathe in front of the staff
18. When I needed help I had to repeatedly ask.
19. Each concern I raised was met with “no entiendo nada”
20. I was shouted at  allowing vomit to get on the cot sheets
21. I was kicked awake by a tecnica while sitting on my suitcase
22. Conflicting medical advice given
23. Dietary advice given that is not in accordance with common international practices, such as WHO.

Emilio five days before going into hospital.

Emilio five days in to his hospital stay and finally lucid.

Emilio  five months after his hospital visit

 

The Secret to Speaking Spanish

And so we have entered 2016!

Did you don your yellow knickers? Regardless, I am sure if you try to keep smiling then 2016 will be … full of smiles!!

Have you made any resolutions? Here is mine: speak Spanish! I think I speak ok but [the embarassing truth is that] I have a degree in Spanish  and I’m nowhere near fluent!

Gahh but speaking another language is not like how I’d imagined. I never picked it up on my first day here like I thought I would, and I don’t wake up every morning with the words flying off my tongue like a freckled Salma Hayek. In fact, most days its the exact opposite! Sometimes my suegra speaks to me and it feels like my head is underwater – are they words she’s using? It’s nothing to do with the fact we’re in Chile – land of the terrible Spanish (or  so everyone likes to point out) – but more to do with the fact that I’m just not that linguistically gifted. In other words – I ain’t got no skills.

The fault is no-one’s but my own. I will not go blaming Chile for having a dialect of Castellano that is so rapidly spoken and poetic that half of us just don’t get it. Most of the time a good “si pero porque piensas eso?” works well in most situations or, failing that, a quick subject change, but darn it there are times when you just need to understand the conversation. Like when someone is actually asking you to pass the salt and your asking why starts an even bigger conversation! Scratch that – you are highly unlikely to ever confuse the word sal because it’s such a staple item in the Chilean diet!

So my New Years Resolution is to speak only Spanish.  It’s really difficult to change the language of your relationship once it’s set, but now that I’m no longer working in Spanish I am pretty much living in Chile but speaking English every day! It’s just really hard telling the Mr. to do his blimmin dishes every half an hour in Spanish – I’m already frustrated let alone including grammatical conjugations in there!

Like I said, the problem is me. I just don’t like hearing myself speak Spanish. I don’t like the confusion when I misunderstand, or the constant corrections. I hate the completely blank look or the “no entendi” (with compulsory giggle) that accompanies each drawn out paragraph I utter – I deflate like a forgotten balloon at a birthday party each time. I have a very good accent it’s true, but only when I sing. I just can’t sing my way through Registro Civil, unfortunately.

I tell my English students that there is no secret to speaking another language except … speaking it. You must speak it to learn it. You can write perfect grammar to your heart’s content but if someone asks you something and you freeze up then you’re not really speaking it, are you? So my New Year’s Resolution is exactly that: to open my mouth and SPEAK SPANISH!!

Me before I came to Chile: “speaking Spanish is a walk in the park!”

P.S.  Nearly forgot – Happy new year and Feliz Anio Nuevo!